we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
