She said her name was "party"
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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