the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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