Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize