Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I've blown a few things in my day
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
