She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
