You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
