so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
smell my finger.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
