As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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