Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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