TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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