yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
