What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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