I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
