i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I wish you could order shots online.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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