Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
