Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize