STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
