One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
