I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
