...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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