You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
