Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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