I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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