I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
you didnt know i had herpes?
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
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