I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
did i just pee glitter
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
