if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
