She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
