is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
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