CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
