Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
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