The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
