you have to choose: penises or morals?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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