I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I have post one night stand depression
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