dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize