thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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