you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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