DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
