I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Randomize
