Porn is love you can see.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
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