Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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