you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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