I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
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