Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
