I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Randomize