i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
We left the knife in your bed.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
