at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
