just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
