I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
