Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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